This week I met another bereaved mother. By now I know a small group of the most amazing women. We are all members of a club we didn’t want to join. We meet and tell our stories. We get to talk about our precious babies who didn’t get to come home with people who want to hear all about them and don’t mind how much the stories are repeated. We exchange photos, talk about who they looked like, what weight they were, how we picked their names etc. These are questions rarely asked by people outside of our club. We talk about how we’re coping with people who get it. We can rant about life without judgement. We all share the same love for our babies and a profound grief. We ask each other on “dates” with an ease I wish was there in my single days. These mothers have helped me to accept that am not alone. My daily emails with the first mother I met are one of the highlights of my day.I tackled French Style Macarons this week. They’d been on my to do list for ages. I now owned a baking thermometer and so there was no excuse. They required concentration and precision (whisking until the meringue reaches 50 degrees!). I felt particularly stressed and fearful this week. This isn’t a quick recipe which is exactly what I needed.  While following all the instructions my mind could be in the present for a few hours of pretty pink macaron making. Here’s the batch I gave to the other mother I met…

Not only can I see how far I have journeyed in my grief, I can also see how far I’ve come since my “all in one” sponge cake recipes.

*Top tip:

Make the ganache before you make the meringues.  This allows it to set to a semi solid consistency.  I left mine to set over night.  This means there is no leakage when you come to pipe the filling.